Border Security? We Don't Need No Steenking Border Security!

In a flash of brilliance, typical of what this blog is famous for, I've found a way to solve two problems at once.

Much of this country believes that we need to do something to shore up our borders. We focus on the Southern border, but the North is just as porous. What we can't seem to agree on is how to do it. Should we hire people to patrol, build a fence, or invade?

The far, but not all the way toward really wacky (where people think we ought to just let everyone come on in and have some free government aid), leftwing answer would be to hire people. Hire lots of people, with racial quotas, and give them cushy union jobs with no accountability to anyone. That's the ideal way to get things done in La-LaLand.

The extreme rightwing answer is push the button, let god sort 'em out.

So the correct answer must be in the middle: build a fence. But, fences are expensive. We'd have to let people bid on providing the fencing material and constructing the fence. It's not as expensive as paying thousands of government employees overtime to take naps and surf the web for porn, but there's still a better way.

We should build a wall with material that is readily available and needs to be moved. What about garbage, or nuclear waste? There always seems to be someone complaining that we'll run out of space for both of those. We could build a wall of garbage on our borders so high that no one can climb over it. If some ambitious border jumper gets halfway up the hill to start an avalanche, that's his problem.

what do you think? Can I finally stop recycling dirty pizza boxes?